17 Yr Old Called Off Her Wedding With A 26 Yrs Old Man For This.
I called off my wedding 3 months before it happened. Why? I was a 17 year old (I’d have been 18 at the time of the wedding) about to marry a 26 year old man that had been dating me for 3 years. I was a victim about to marry her abuser.
The engagement ring, which I did eventually find out was fake (he has money. Lots of it, but that didn’t matter to me) was to buy my consent/silence/whatever as he stuck his dick in everything that moved. He was an alcoholic, a narcissist, a pedophile (seriously, I wasn’t a 14 year old that looked like an 18 year old. I was a 14 year old that looked like a 12 year old.)
I loved him because I thought he was saving me from my horrid situation with my family. My mom and I moved in with her boyfriend, only to find out too late that he was an abuser. He’d take me away from it, even if it was just for a little while.
I was so messed up. I ended up living in a boarding house when things finally broke in my abusive household because, of course, I was 17 and he didn’t want me to move in until I turned 18 (his career depended on a squeaky clean image.) I ended up pregnant, having a violent end to my pregnancy that resulted in my daughter’s stillbirth.
Despite this all, I loved him. But he started picking at my appearance. I was “gaining too much weight” even though I was at a healthy weight for my age/height. I had gotten hips and breasts… so we talked about dieting. I stopped eating. I drank water when I’d get hungry. Everything had to be low fat/no fat, low calorie/no calorie, and sugar free. It worked. I went from “healthy” to “underweight.” What made me realize that I wanted out was a box of chicken wings.
I ended up moving back in with my mother after she was able to escape her ex. We lived near an indoor flea market/farmer’s market that had the most amazing food vendors. I love food, and this diet was killing me. I was f**king miserable. So, I decided to have a cheat day, and I went and ordered a box of hot wings from the chicken place in the farmer’s market. As I sat down with my favorite movie, eating my favorite food, I realized that the extreme dieting would always be my life. I also realized that he wanting me to be so unhealthy wasn’t right. I was tired all the time, cold all the time, hungry all the time. I decided, while happily munching on that box of wings, I was done.
I called him, told him that I was done. It took me another 3 years to truly be done, but the very expensive wedding was done and over. He never got any deposits back. It took me almost a decade to realize that he wanted me to look like a 14 year old forever. I was also always dismissive about the age difference, citing that I was mature for my age. I now realize it didn’t matter. I was a child.