I’m 49M and my daughter is 22F. I’ve changed the names in the post.
My best friend, Tom’s daughter Kate, is an architecture major. She got accepted to a college in California and graduated with good results. My daughter Anne also went into architecture and she’s doing well. Anne is generally a quieter person and she does tend to laze around a bit.
Both Anne and Kate applied for a job at the same firm, which is co-owned by Tom’s brother. She didn’t end up getting the job, but Kate did and she was very upset. She’s moved on and got offers from a couple of other places.
We had a “friends” Christmas a couple of days after actual Christmas, where some of my college buddies and their families got together. The conversation turned to Tom and his wife and they were talking about Kate’s new job. I saw Anne and Kate talking and we congratulated her.
We all came back home (Anne left her car at our place and went back to her apartment after). She started saying she has to work so hard to get what Kate gets “handed to her”. I said this is a competitive field and Anne should be more diligent. She blew up at me and my wife, that we’re “egging Kate and Tom on”, and apparently Kate told Anne she could help her out.
I eventually told Anne she needs to stop sulking over Kate, yes maybe Kate had an edge at the firm, but from what I’ve heard from Tom she always works on herself and is getting better, and Anne could learn something.
Well Anne got pretty angry after that. Both me and my wife called her but she didn’t answer.
I don’t think what I said was wrong, but my younger daughter thinks otherwise and said I should post on here. So Am I Wrong?
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted: