A homely-looking girl, who is engaged to be married, decides not to have her gorgeous sister in her bridal party because she doesn’t want to be compared to her on her special day.
Background: I (25F) am a homely looking girl. There is no other way to say it; I am not hot or even pretty by most people’s standards. My sister (27F), “Bella” is one of the most beautiful women who has ever walked this planet. Like, got stopped on the street and in the mall multiple times while we were growing up for modeling opportunities.
We have different dads, and I guess she just won the genetic lottery. I was jealous of her as a kid, especially because we were always compared to one another. I’m 5’4, average body, slightly below average face. She’s 5’11, thin, and all around just really gorgeous.
She’s also a genuinely great person. She’s humble and sweet, and even though she could’ve made a living off of her looks, she ended up going into social work and now works with kids in foster care. Her and I are close. We see one another a bit less since she moved to a new city with her husband, but we constantly text and call. I was her maid of honor two years ago at her wedding.
Four months ago my fiancé (30M), Allen, proposed to me and I said yes. My family was excited for me and they all liked him. Him and I have been together for just over two years. Bella and Allen are close as well, and we often have them over for dinner or go to their house for game nights.
Now to the issue. I thought about it a lot and decided to not have Bella in my bridal party. I just wanted one day where we weren’t standing side-by-side, being compared. I wanted to be the pretty one standing at the altar on my day. I’ve gotten over my jealousy of her for the most part and accepted myself for how I look and who I am, but the thought of everyone looking at her at my wedding broke my heart.
She obviously thought she would be my maid of honor, and so before I asked anyone to be in my bridal party, I went to her house to talk to her. I didn’t want her to hear through the grapevine or social media that she wasn’t only not my maid of honor, but not in my bridal party at all. When I went over and told her and explained my reasoning, she started to cry.
She didn’t get mad at me, but she said it was really hurtful that I’d exclude her because of the way she looks. I understand her point. Her and I are best friends. She’s been giving me a bit of a cold shoulder since this happened, and my parents (both our mom and each of our dads) have called me a major AH for doing this to her, saying she’s more upset than she let on but didn’t want to taint “my day” with drama. She RSVP’d to the wedding invite, so I know she’ll still be coming no matter what, but I feel bad that I have excluded her just because of her looks now.
Am I Wrong ?
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