Me (34f) and my husband, Harry got married last month. His sister, Sally (25f) had moved in with us in Feb-22. I was not comfortable with the arrangement as I am someone who really needs personal space. I had been living alone for a long time before I moved in with Harry in Jan-22.
He said he cannot ask Sally to leave as she is young, new in job and has had issues with roommates before. Also he is ‘responsible’ for her as their parents live in another city. And she is too young to live by herself in a big city (she is earning through).
We agreed to give this 6 months. On Aug-22 he said let’s get married first and do this, otherwise there will be a lot of family drama and you will be seen in a bad light. I agreed.
Now we are married and he has still not spoken to her or the family about Sally moving out. He told me that this will take more time. I do not see a reason to delay or a concrete plan around this. Sally had (vaguely) indicated to him she wants to start a business at some point in time which would take her to another city. He is hoping this might happen and the problem will solve itself. Meanwhile he has blamed me for not being ‘supportive to family’.
Meanwhile, Sally doesn’t seem very grateful for this. According to Harry, Sally knows I am not comfortable with this arrangement. She comes across as a spoilt child who always gets her way through tantrums.
I feel like I was taken for a ride. Manipulated. While I care for Sally, I need my personal boundaries to be respected. I need my time. I need our couple’s time to develop a good foundation for our marriage. These are important and no one seems to care.
At last stop, 1 month after our marriage I told Harry I will move out. I can’t fathom any other way out. It’s just been 1 month of us as a married couple and I am already bailing out on our first disagreement. Am I Wrong here ?
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