Some argue that the notion of family should be regarded as a value, something to be treasured at all costs. However, families may not always work for everybody, particularly when there is conflict and possibly even power exertion by parents over their children, even if the children are all grown up and you do not need to use strong emotion to communicate a message. Maybe you just need to listen rather than convey a message. Whatever the situation may be, the following anecdote demonstrates how awful things may get at times as a result of this.
I (23F) live at home. I am in grad school and work part time + intern at an office. I graduate in June and I’ve been applying to jobs as much as I can so I can finally move out. My sister (20F) also lives at home but is doing school online and doesn’t work, I try to help with chores around the house as much as possible, although it’s difficult since I leave the house early in the morning and come home late at night.
Last week, I came home and there were clean dishes in the dishwasher, I said I’m gonna take a quick shower then empty the dishwasher and my dad went on a rant about how I’m useless and never help around the house and that my sister is always the one doing everything, I explained that I do help and that just because they haven’t seen me help doesn’t mean that I don’t, he asked me to give him an example and I told him that I took the garbage out the night before, the conversation escalated to him saying that I should shut up and not argue any longer because he can easily make me homeless if he wanted to.
I said ok and went upstairs, the next morning while everyone was still asleep I packed my things and left and I’ve been sleeping in my car for a week and taking showers at my gym, later in the day after I left my parents called and my mom texted me asking where I am when I didn’t come home when I was supposed to, I didn’t reply and blocked my entire family’s numbers and social media’s and haven’t spoken to them since. They have been calling and texting my friends asking them where I am, I haven’t told any of my friends that I’m sleeping in my car so I got very confused texts from friends asking me what’s going on and why my parents are asking where I am and if I’m safe and ok, I told my closest friend that I left home and that I’m safe and let her know to tell my parents that I’m fine but I have no desire to speak to them anymore.
They’ve been begging my friend to disclose my location and asking her to ask me to allow them to speak to me. I went to my friends yesterday and she told me that what I did was awful and that I should speak to them, I told her that they threatened to make me homeless so I left by my own volition but she’s insisting that making them worry about my safety is a horrible thing to do but I honestly think I just gave them what they asked for, they wanted to get rid of me so I left. Am I a Jerk for leaving and refusing to communicate with them?
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