When it comes to co-parenting, not all will be on the same page. However, in this story a father has described how he allowed his daughter to shave her head against his wife’s protests. Read the story to know what happens next and let us know whose side you are on.
Me (29M) and my wife (30F) have a little girl (8F) who I’ll be calling Anna.
Now, Anna has very thick, blonde and curly hair that my wife adores. Ever since she was a toddler, she’d spend hours doing her hair every day, braiding it, straightening it and styling it in all sorts of ways. Our bathroom cabinets are always filled to the brim with a bunch of hair lotions, oils, creams and other fancy products I don’t even know the names of. So I think it’s more than fair to say that my wife’s a bit obsessed with the whole hair thing. Anna, however, has never been too fond of getting her hair done, or of anything that involves having to sit still for more than a few minutes.
Before she got it cut, her hair used to reach past her waist. And while it looked lovely, she hated getting it brushed and every morning used to be a screaming fest between her and my wife. Lately, she’d been begging for a shorter haircut. My wife ignored her whenever the topic was brought up in hopes that she’d forget about it, but none of that ended up happening.
I think Anna realized she was getting nowhere with her mom, because she started asking me to take her instead. I was reluctant at first because I didn’t know how my wife would react, but I agreed when I saw just how excited the kid was over something as simple as a haircut.
So yesterday I drove her to the hairdresser, where she got to flip through a lot of magazines and pick a picture of a haircut. And when she chose a really short clipper cut, I knew I was gonna be in deep sh%t with my wife. At that point though, there was no turning back. I mean, what could I have really done? Told her that no, she can’t get the haircut she was so over the moon about, all because her mom wouldn’t like it? I couldn’t do that.
So we went ahead with the haircut, and by the end of it Anna couldn’t stop smiling. She went around the salon showing it off to everyone and even asked me to take a bunch of pictures even though she normally hates having pictures taken of her. We did get one rude comment from an older woman at the salon, something along the lines of ‘You can’t even tell if she’s a boy or a girl now’, but Anna was way too excited about her hair to notice, and if she did notice she didn’t care.
When my wife got home from work that day though, things quickly took a turn for the worse. She refused to even look at Anna, locked herself in her room and cried then got in the car and drove off. It’s been a day now and she’s still not back, it’s honestly starting to worry me. I knew she wouldn’t react well to the haircut but I wasn’t expecting her to take it this badly. The kid’s upset too and no matter how much I reassure her she still thinks she’s in trouble for getting her hair cut.
Am I a Jerk in this situation? I realize how attached my wife was to Anna’s hair, but at the end of the day I still think it’s just hair. The kid’s old enough to decide these things for herself and she was really happy with the haircut, so I don’t think I did something wrong here.
What do you think about this situation? Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted: