Father Refuses To Pay Biological Son Fee’s The Internet Backs Him On His Decision.
Everybody finds parenting challenging, but what if you aren’t really a parent? Is it ever your duty to raise a kid who you biologically parented but wasn’t involved in raising? Read the story and let us know whether this man is wrong/ right in refusing to cover my biological son’s college expenses.
When I (40m) was about 22, my wife (38f) was friends with a married couple, both currently 40f, who wanted to have a baby but didn’t want to deal with the costs of using a sperm donor agency. My wife suggested I donate my sperm, and they agreed but made me sign a paper giving away any and all parental rights to the kid. I had no issue with this as at the time I wasn’t looking to be a parent. It took a couple of tries but using a turkey baster they were able to get pregnant using my donated sperm. They moved away before the baby was born, and my wife kept in contact with them but they were more her friends than mine and I never met the kid.
They send pictures of him from time to time, and he does look a little like me but I had no desire to pursue a relationship with him. Fast forward to now when my wife told me her friends wanted me to meet their son. I agreed because I figured why not, and she set up the date. We met up with them and I met their kid (18M) for the first time. He seemed like a good person and I wouldn’t mind getting to know him more but honestly I didn’t feel any sort of father son connection to him.
After a while they let me know the true reason they were here- they couldn’t afford for him to go to the college he wanted to go to. They asked me to pay his tuition which was upwards of 50k. I said no immediately. They got upset and started saying that as his father I had a responsibility to make sure he got a good education but I responded by saying that I had signed over my parental rights per their request and therefore had no responsibility towards him. They got upset and left. They’ve been calling and texting my wife ever since to get me to change my mind but I’ve remained firm. My wife and I have two kids of our own to put through college and I can’t be paying another kid’s tuition. I do feel bad because he seemed like an alright kid.
What advice would you give to deal with a situation like this? Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted: