“I Say The Wrong Things And Then Stew Over Them For Years To Come.”
Story by Jacalyn Wetzel
Y’all, I’m left out a lot. Not like an “oh, your invite got lost in the mail” excuse, but like a full on didn’t think to come up with an excuse because inviting you never crossed my mind kind of way.
I mean, I get it. I’m weird and opinionated. I say the wrong things and then stew over them for years to come.
It’s true. I will lay there some random day 5 years from now watching the clock strike 3 AM and think about that time I used the wrong word in a sentence. I don’t know why I’m like that, but it’s fine. I like me.
People get left out all the time and it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with them, maybe they just haven’t found their people yet. Or maybe they’re like me and have their people but their people live all over the country and not just down the road.
It’s also a strong possibility that the people you thought were made to stay forever – weren’t.
We humans have this weird thing we do when we try to make a forever friendship or relationship out of something that was so obviously supposed to be temporary. We should stop that.
It’s nice to be invited. It’s nice to be included and the first one called, but it’s not everything. In life we have to find comfort in our own company. We have to slow down and look for deeper friendships that involve the mess of life, not just the good times.
Finding the kind of friends that will come over and ignore your sink full of dishes while you vent, or help you clean when they hear you’re overwhelmed takes time. It takes finding who you are in the quiet moments and knowing what you need from a friendship.
As we age we find more and more of our friends wind up in the acquaintance category, and sometimes what’s left is just you.
In those moments know that you are enough. Your laugh is enough. Your quirks are enough. Your inability to settle for anything less than what you would give to someone else is enough.
Your people will come. Your people will be there when it’s hard. Your people will love who you are. They will call you first. You’ll never have to wait on an invite because your presence will be expected and your absence will be felt.
I am enough my friends, and so are you.