Story by Janie Porter
It’s so easy to do.
And we see it all the time.
Facebook updates about that woman’s fabulous family life and perfect children and amazing husband who just bought her another expensive gift.
Instagram photos that showcase a perfect life or a perfect vacation or a perfect house, and are always perfectly-posed, yet designed to look like a candid photo.
Or even the mom at preschool who never yells at her kids, and always looks effortlessly fabulous, happy and put-together in her makeup, size 0 jeans and Hunter boots.
I call them unicorn moms.
Because everything you see is perfect and beautiful.
And NOT REAL.
Here’s the deal with being a mom today, and a woman in general:
People don’t want fake.
People want real.
Real friendships, real people, real life.
People want the girl who can share the raw, the ugly, the personal. Who, for a select few, can let you see the non-social-media-approved version of herself. Not because she’s trying to win you over, but because she’s just owning her life.
Pretending that your life is perfect, or your kids are flawless, or your life is fabulous, or that you just wake up looking like that, just isn’t reality.
I know it.
But sometimes, I forget.
I look at those beautiful pictures and wonder why my house wasn’t flawlessly decorated for Halloween, with chic black-and-white pumpkins and black velvety spiders hanging from the side of our stately, expansive home.
And I forget that that’s not real. That house in the picture doesn’t always look like that, and there’s probably a mess, just slightly out-of-frame.
I see that update about that woman’s perfect husband and my stomach drops as I remember my last argument with my husband, when I yelled at him for roughhousing with the kids just before dinner.
And I forget that that’s not the whole story. My husband is amazing and he loves me, and we talk things out. He’s not perfect all the time, and neither am I. You know why? Because we’re real people. We’re not unicorns.
I scroll to the photo of that family lined up on Sunday, 2 parents and 6 kids, wearing coordinating church outfits and looking as happy as Christmas morning.
And I forget that those people aren’t robots and probably have their moments. And my family is also happy, even though the kids are often dressed in stained Spiderman shirts, their jeans are ripped, and at least one of them is usually wearing mismatched shoes.
But here’s the truth about my life, and yours.
Your life is full and beautiful and amazing, just the way it is.
Because it is real.
Don’t be a unicorn mom.
Just be you.
It’s so much more interesting and beautiful than any fake perfect life you could ever create.