The writer is struggling with their in-laws’ traditional beliefs and their insistence that their daughters wear dresses when visiting. While the writer doesn’t mind wearing dresses, their tomboyish daughters are uncomfortable and complain the entire time. The writer is torn between respecting their in-laws’ beliefs and making their daughters happy, especially since their oldest daughter plans to cut off contact with her grandparents after turning 18.
My in-laws are what you would call traditional. They seem to think the world should have stopped 50 years ago, and think everything since then is evil. They aren’t racist (that I know of) or outwardly bigoted, but they just are very old fashioned.
My husband and I have three children (16f, 14f, 10m) and we go to visit all their grandparents since they live close. Here’s the issue, they don’t like the idea of women wearing pants. My MIL says it’s “showing off” and my FIL always says it isn’t christian. Now I’m pretty feminine, so I don’t mind throwing on a dress when we stop by, but our daughters are not.
They don’t like visiting my husband’s parents, which breaks his heart, because we make them put on a dress before they go. They are both pretty tomboyish, and they never wear any dresses otherwise. I had to but each of them a few dresses specifically so they can go. To be clear it’s not like they aren’t allowed over if they wear pants, it’s just that they won’t shut up the entire time about how much they hate it.
Our daughters hate this, and think it’s unfair. I guess it is, but in a lot of cultures women only wear skirts and dresses so I don’t think it’s a big deal. Plus it isn’t like it hurts them to wear a dress a few times a week for a few hours. The issue is our oldest is planning to never speak to her grandparents again after she’s 18, and I’m worried it’s affecting them. Am I Wrong ? What Should I Do ?
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