(Thanks Charles for submitting this to our page).
I’m 37m. My friend is 35, and a few weeks ago he started dating this girl who is 17. Now, where I’m from the age of consent is 16 so technically it’s not illegal. But I can’t fathom how uncomfortable their relationship makes me feel.
He’ll invite her to do activities with our group and she always looks out of place. To paint a picture for you, we’re all 30+ years old. We drink, we smoke, most of us are already married and have kids and careers, then there’s his girlfriend…still in high school, isn’t even a legal adult yet, can’t do things like drink or smoke, never been married, still lives at home with her parents. If that doesn’t paint a clear enough picture for you, then let me continue.
To make it more uncomfortable, she looks her age. When sitting next to us you can clearly tell she’s a teenage girl, not the type to be mistaken for a young woman in her 20s. When she’s around I can’t bring myself to talk to her, I’ve tried making conversation by asking about her interests just so she feels included, but the things she likes compared to the things I like are drastically different.
She doesn’t understand the jokes and references I make because she’s too young to know what I’m talking about. F**k, she has no clue who Stevie Wonder is, that’s mind blowing. While her interests in music is more up to date with today’s artist, people like Billie Eilish for example.
The contrast between a teen girl and a middle aged man is staggering. In my eyes she’s still a child, regardless of what the age of consent is. How a grown man can find a girl that age attractive doesn’t sit right with me. Although it’s legal I can’t help but raise an eyebrow at my friend and question who he is as a person. I’ve talked to the rest of the group about their relationship and we all agree that it’s very weird and off-putting. One of our buddies is especially grossed out since he has a daughter close to her age. Yeah, yikes….
I want to talk confront him, but I don’t know how to go about it.