Pregnant Woman Doesn’t Want To Leave Her Cheating Fiancé. She Is Confused.
A wonderful relationship needs respect, love and communication. Being cheated in a relationship with whom you love the most is like getting stabbed in the back. In this story a girl who is expecting a baby is in a dilemma with her relationship. (This story was sent to us by Bailey).
I’ve (32F) been with my fiancé (33M) for 5 years. We were supposed to get married last August, but made the tough decision to postpone our big day until August of 2022 because a lot of our older family members had expressed concerns with flying and being around a crowd of people.
I met him at work, we are both hair stylists at a higher end salon. It’s not a really creative environment. Occasionally you’ll get someone who wants rainbow hair, but other than that it’s very generic colors and cuts. Like 9 months ago, he told me he was feeling really depressed and stagnant at work and wanted to quit and work in a more creative environment. I supported him and he started working at a new salon within the month. Literally everyone who works there is in their early to mid 20’s besides him.
Instantly he was so much happier and within a few weeks he expressed his desire to start trying for a family and wanting me to come off the pill. I told him I thought it would be better to wait a little while (preferably after the wedding) because he wasn’t bringing in the same money he used to. Some of his clients followed him, but the majority didn’t so his book/money was cut in half.
His birthday is in May and he brought up trying again and how he’s in a good place at work and the timing is right. I agreed to come off BC not really trying or prevent it thinking it would take months to get pregnant. I got pregnant in June (20 weeks 4 days) and we’re both excited for the next chapter of our lives together.
In July he changes his hours and starts working more and he tells me it’s because he wants to be able to have money set aside for the baby because I won’t be working for 6-8 weeks after birth. I don’t think anything of it and think it’s sweet he’s trying to provide for the baby.
Two weeks ago he sat me down crying telling me he screwed up. I’m thinking he got fired. He cheated on me with his 20 year old apprentice/stylist under him. I was in complete shock. because this is what he wanted. He told me it’s been going on since he found out I was pregnant because all of a sudden things he thought about just got really real and he couldn’t handle it. I told him I couldn’t deal with all this now and he needed to get out and stay with friends or family.
He’s been calling and texting me non-stop and apologizing. Wanting to work on things, but he won’t quit. I don’t trust him and don’t think I can unless he leaves his job and isn’t around her all the time. I’ve talked to my therapist about this and I really don’t know what the right answer is here. I’m not pissed, I’m hurt. He’s going to be in my life forever one way or another. I told him I’m 99% sure this is something I can’t get over. I’m really trying my hardest to stay calm for the baby’s sake because I know stress isn’t good and can lead to issues.
Any advice would be great?? Him not being involved is not an option. I would never be that cruel. He’ll be a great father. He’s so good with kids.