People in a relationship should be encouraging of one another and delighted that the other person is not overworked but is paid enough to live comfortably. In practice, this is not always the case. A man was irritated because his girlfriend was earning more while working less. Read the story to know what happened between the lovers and share your views on this.
My girlfriend and I both work in tech, she’s a safety validator for software, working at a consulting firm, and I’m doing network infrastructure support.
When we both worked in different offices I didn’t know much about her day to day life at work.
I knew she made a lot more than me, 120k to my 66k, and she credits a lot of that to job hopping, she’s 25 and has had three full time jobs since college. I’ve been at one place since college.
But since we’ve been working from home, I’ve seen a lot of her daily schedule. And hers versus mine are really different.
She gets up at 9:15 to drag herself into the home office for her 9:30-10 daily meeting.
After the meeting she goes and showers and has breakfast from about 10 to 10:45, answering a few slack messages and emails on her phone but mostly just listening to podcasts and eating and doing her morning routine.
Then she works till noon, and takes a lunch break from noon till 1. Then she works from 1 to 4, often having meetings or working on her own stuff. And at 4 will spend an hour or so doing household chores and stuff while keeping an eye on her phone to answer emails.
And outside of 9 to 5 she blocks work related messages from her phone.
So basically she actually works about 4 and a half hours daily, and does her own thing for about 2 hours, just paying enough attention to reply to emails that come in.
I basically work nonstop from 8:30 to 5 or 6 pm, working 8.5 to 9.5 hours a day. I don’t take breaks on the workday to shower or eat breakfast and lunch or do household chores.
And a few weeks ago I got kinda frustrated with her for basically hardly doing anything for her job at all. And that they were overpaying her if she was spending half the day slacking.
She got frustrated with me and said that they hired her for her knowledge and it wasn’t my place to say what her time was worth, that if her boss and ceo saw the work she produced and chose to pay her what they chose to pay her that it wasn’t my place to undervalue her because i was being jealous. And that she picked her job instead of one that might pay better because she wanted a good work life balance, she was sick of wasting her life away at work that was a lot more demanding.
I said that she was being a little privileged, not a lot of people can just choose to make six figures and wander off from work for practically half the day, and that all I was saying was that she was working half as hard as a lot of people who earn a lot less.
She got mad at me and said that it’s not up to me to decide what her time is worth
Am I A Jerk for what I said about my girlfriend’s work ethic?