Wife Admits Her Affair With The Professor.

If you have failed in love do not worry since he or she wasn’t meant for you. Love your life and love yourself. (Thanks Dylan for sharing this story with us through our page).

Source: Reddit

We were living in New England at the time. My wife had just started a new job, and I was pretty well entrenched in my career there. We’d just bought our first house five years ago, and I loved it. Things seemed to be going really well – we were both earning good money, our house was beautiful, and our relationship was solid (I thought).

Then she decided she didn’t want to live there anymore. She missed her Mom and her family, and she wanted to go home. She wanted me to be with her, just not there. She told me this via text message, while sending me a copy of an offer letter for a new job that she had interviewed for secretly and told me she was accepting. The emotional crisis was suddenly in full swing, and I was blind to the lead-up.

My world was totally rocked. All three legs of my milking stool – marriage, career, and home – kicked out from under me in the blink of an eye. She was going, and if I wanted to stay married, so was I. That meant having to sell our home, quit my job, find a new job, find a new home, etc…no small feat.

She left at the beginning of winter, and we decided that I would live alone until the spring when the housing market started back up, and we could get top dollar for our property, and have more of a selection to chose from ourselves. I had made it clear that I would only go from a home, to another home. Getting the first house was reaching a goal I never thought possible, and I was reluctant to give it up so quickly and go back to renting. I saw that as an absolute crushing failure.

Spring is right around the corner, and BOOM, COVID shows up, which slowed my plans to join her. On top of that, my job – who I had been communicating my struggles with from the start – didn’t want to lose me, and was working out a way to keep me onboard as a permanent remote worker. This was a time consuming HR process which only slowed things down more.

All-in-all, we were living apart for about 10 months, while I was riding out the winter, navigating COVID, working with my employer to keep my job, selling our house and buying a new one. We saw each other almost every weekend, but those visits were often difficult. I was bitter about the entire situation, and she was angry with me over my bitterness.

Six months in to our new home, she admits to me that she had an affair that lasted for nearly our entire time apart. He was a former college professor of hers, and they had maintained a friendship via Facebook ever since. He was significantly older than her, and recently divorced. He had begun reaching out to her to talk through his troubles, and she – angry with me – was talking to him in turn. She later met him at a conference in Boston, on his invitation, to hear him speak. After his presentation, they shared a drink, then went back to his room.

They met up once or twice a week for the 10 months we were apart. While I was hugging my wife’s pillow in our empty bed, she was hugging him in his. He – a psychology professor who has authored papers on manipulation – told her she was in the right, that I was an awful husband who should have dropped everyone and everything on a whim and followed her if I didn’t want this to be happening. He told her that because I stayed behind to try and keep my job and sell our home, that I was likely never coming and, even an indication that I hated her.

Their affair ended when he moved away for a new job (after being fired from his existing job for “posing a significant risk to the campus, staff, and students” of his employer, i.e. sleeping with students and spitting on another professor during an argument). He wanted her to join him and start a life with him, but she refused. They had sex one final time. He got her pregnant (a feat I had been unsuccessful at despite my best efforts…at least I hope so; she says she is confident it was his and not mine). Then she aborted the baby.

One month later, I joined her in a new home that I had bought for us.

I often wish she went with him, or at the very least had the courtesy to tell me about the affair before I sold my home, moved to this wasteland I now live in, and committed myself to a future of what basically amounts to house arrest – staying in my tiny home office, all day long, every day, with no coworkers outside of those I see on ZOOM calls, and no friends outside of the people I meet on games… The one person I do see every day? My wife.

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