Having your own child and adopting one are two very different experiences, each with its own set of pleasures and hardships. One phase that many adoptive parents overlook is choosing a name and what they wish to call their kid. In this story when this mother changed her child’s name, the original parents were furious, and the situation erupted, with everyone snapping at each other, and she now believes she was too harsh. Read the story and share your thoughts on this.
My husband and I took in his cousin Sue’s newborn due to her and her partner John’s addiction issues. It’s not a decision I regret. This beautiful boy is the light of my life but it was a major life change for us. Especially me as I was the one who gave up my job and my social life to be basically locked up isolated during covid with a baby. It was supposed to be temporary while they went to rehab. They never went to rehab nor complied with any of the safety plans set up by CPS.
From 2 months on they have not seen the baby nor supported him in anyway. Johns family has not been involved either as they also refused to abide by the safety plan or any of the CPS recommendations. Now 2 years later my husband and I have full legal custody and CPS has closed the file. We have put forth a petition to change the baby’s name. At birth John and Sue named the boy Steven to “honor” John’s brother who died of an overdose (while partying with John and Sue who was PREGNANT and getting high).
My husband and I have never ever referred to the baby by that name. We always called him Davey (his middle name) after Sue and my husband’s grandfather. So instead of being Steven David Jones we are changing it to David Owen Smith. Owen is after my father who absolutely adores him and accepted him as grandson from day one. So here’s where I might have ventured to a**hole.
My husband thinks I went too far but I feel they pushed me to the end. John’s family found out and blew up my social media and messaging.(not husbands just mine) Telling me that I have no right to change the name or honour my father because I’m nothing more than a babysitter and I’m not the real mother. I was called a babythief amongst more vile accusations.
So I snapped and responded back that MY son’s names will honour good men that he could proudly emulate not like their junkie relative who was a sh*tstain on the world defrauding the govt for benefits and stealing from anyone he could and contributed nothing to life or society and his only accomplishment is that he odeed before he went to prison. Harsh.yes. but I still don’t feel like I’m an a**hole. I am here for an unbiased opinion ?
edit for clarity
I did not change the name on my own. My husband was very involved in the decision as were our 2 daughters who helped name their baby brother. The name reflects our cohesion as a family. We are ALL Smith’s. And my girls came up with the idea of using Pippys name because it shows he wasn’t just adopted by my husband and I but by an entire family
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted: