In a healthy relationship, everything just appears to work. This isn’t to say that there won’t be bumps on the road – but, ideally, you’d fight for respect and open communication, which would make dealing with problems simpler. However, there is a negative aspect to being in a relationship. You may be oblivious to the poison that your spouse delivers, leaving you feeling depleted, underappreciated, or, in this case, exploited. Sometimes the only healthy thing to do is let go and move on. Read the story to know what happened between the lovers during dinner with his family and do you think the girlfriend did the right thing?
I (f29) have been dating my boyfriend (m35) ‘Ricky’ for 5 months. He’s divorced but hates this word and goes with the word “divorcee” instead since the first one makes it sound like he was “dumped” when it was him who initiated it.
Anyways, He always goes on long rants about his exes and says stuff like “I hope you don’t have this awful habit my ex has” or “hope you like XYZ cause my ex didn’t” and the list goes on.
I found a 2nd job recently and he’s been having me pay every time we go out. When I protest he’d say he’s going through a rough patch and is seeing how much help I can offer.
Last night he invited his family to join us for dinner. We got to the restaurant first. He asked me if I “brought ” enough money, I said why and he told me that he told his parents that I’d pay for their meals. I said why would I and he went on about his parents going through a rough patch just like him. I said “I’m sorry this can’t be a coincidence!” he asked what I meant and I told him that I would not be paying. He insisted, I refused and said no. He then leaned back and said “well, you’re here, so not much of a choice you have anyway” while laughing like it was funny. I silently got up, took my phone and purse and walked right out. He was shocked he started shouting after me to stop and wait but I didn’t.
I went home and he called me enraged saying that I did a horrible thing walking out on him and his parents, while I could’ve just paid. I told him that their unfortunate financial situation isn’t my problem and that I wasn’t obligated to pay for their food. If they couldn’t pay for their meals, then they should not go out. He got offended and said “you’re making money a priority just like my ex did” then went on about how disrespectful my attitude was and how I made him look small in front of his parents and forced him to lie about why I wasn’t there when they came.
We’ve been going back and forth about it til now. He’s mad and is refusing to speak to me til I apologize. Am I Wrong? I feel bad because his parents are lovely and I have been doing my best to keep a good relationship with them. What advice would you give her?
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